Reason_____________________________________
After ages I sit down to write something… Well what triggered me… of course firstly my excellent health condition… Yes doctors have officially declared me insane today :P… so I can be excused for any crap I type today….. and secondly after ages I am ok to pour my heart out … no hiding… none…
After ages I sit down to write something… Well what triggered me… of course firstly my excellent health condition… Yes doctors have officially declared me insane today :P… so I can be excused for any crap I type today….. and secondly after ages I am ok to pour my heart out … no hiding… none…
I read a write
up of my friend Naomi… Someone I haven’t met so far but somehow feel a connect to her already… This is worth sharing indeed…
Here’s the link…
Thought to
myself today…Somewhere I had stopped expecting from my loved ones… Tuff but
this was my way to protect my oh so fragile heart from getting hurt… this just
meant that being there for all but not expecting the same in return… Naomi’s
write up just made me realize that this is not being “ourselves”… We need to
expect best out of our loved ones even it implies being disappointed
a zillion times… being hurt is just a trait that declares – Yes , we are still
humans (Of course I need a certificate now to officially declare that after the
doctor report I just mentioned earlier… lol)
On a serious
note, yes something inside me used to hold me back…
Hold me back
from expecting… Hold me back from trusting immensely (Like a child) like I used
to earlier… Hold me back from loving the way I did earlier… (without any fear
of being hurt)… Hold me back from expressing myself… (With the fear that it won’t
be valued)… Hold me back from being the “Me” I knew earlier…
Each time I used
to get up to just shake off all these thoughts… something held me back… felt as
if there is some sort of a chain I am
tied up with which just pulled me back to where I was… every effort to move on…
every effort to be myself was in vain…
And then… He
happened :)
He saw the me
which had all these amazing traits (lol)… and yet he came along… held my hand
and promised me to deliver from all this pain…
But yet , since
that day , he has been a friend , a guide and an inspiration for me . Without
trying to teach me , he has given me something I could never give myself ,
something no amount of movies could give me , something no amount of hours
immersed at work could give me .
He has given me
a reason…
Reason to
dream again,
Reason to
trust again,
Reason to let
go the pain,
Reason to
accept myself,
Reason to
ignore the rest,
Reason to
live life,
Reason to
move on,
Reason to
stand again,
Reason to
dance in the rain, (Trust me hated that )
Reason to
smile again, (This time without any mask)
And above all
Reason to
love again…
Probably
everyone else thinks this relationship is following the normal , bollywood
inspired storyline , and will end up fizzing out in a few months or years ,
replaced by the real questions such as who brings the kids from the school or
why haven’t I still paid the telephone bill , but I know he will always be the
same special one for me…
I don't know
if 'You' are reading this , but if you are , I just want you to know that I
have made a lot of mistakes , and my grammar is all wrong , and I crack jokes
nobody gets , but I love you lots... . And I will never stop doing
that …
Love,
Rashmi
Thank you so much <3 :* This is so precious. Tears welled up in my eyes when I read this. It's beautiful to see Him work. :)
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