Grown Up's- Are We ?

Grown Up's- Are We ?

Recently I watched this show on television where in the host (Juhi Chawala) asks questions to kids… and for most of the questions kids did have interesting answers…

Juhis Question – What are the biggest 3 problems of your life

Kids Answer

1. If I go out and it rains and I do not have an umbrella I will get drenched. That’s big problem

2. If I fall down and hurt myself, mom will yell at me.

3. If I wreck my dads lappy, I should just apologize or else I will be in big problem

I thought to myself… when I was a kid , the answers to my question were simple and absolute… no ambiguity… none… I learned that 2 plus 2 is always 4… always believed that the harder you worked, better the grades you achieve… strongly thought that good behavior will always help you gain appreciation… thought one dies only when old age strikes…and I strongly believed in these things, with my little exposure to the world…

Love was such a simple concept… I knew we could fall in love with a guy younger to us or has a height less than a girls… marriage… if someone asked me back then I would say ofcourse , one has to get married to the one he/she loves…come what may… Moral science was simple… we all knew that God exists and he gives whatever we pray for… faith was infinite… knew he lived in the chapel in our school building… was absolutely sure about it… 100% … no doubts about it… none… no second thoughts either…

But the more I learned, my surety went for a toss…

Now I am not sure if hardwork can take you anywhere but yeah I am sure it can lead you to no where… Love can go for a toss… every relationship does not end up in marriage… God is everywhere now I know… but why is the faith so low at times… even when I sit in the same chapel in my school… I don’t feel His presence when back I knew 100% that God lived there…


I now know that working the hardest doesn’t necessarily make you the smartest, and you could study everything and still flunk. The guy who got lower grades than you in school could be making ten times more money than you are, and not every good deed goes appreciated. Someone with almost no publications could get into Harvard, while someone with many publications could end up in a local small university…

As a kid, I always thought there is an absolute answer that fits everyone’s questions. Not anymore. When I ask myself a basic question like, “Should I get married?”, I honestly don’t know the answer to it, even with all my knowledge and wisdom. On one hand, it sounds like a wonderful idea, companionship and all, but on the other hand, I am not so sure if it is that much of a value addition in my life. The honest answer is, “I don’t know”. Yet if you asked me the same question as a kid, I would have said, “Of course. Everyone should be married before they grow old and have white hair.” Then, there are other existential questions I struggle with, I have no direct answer to…

Looking at my philosophy I know I don’t stand any place in the corporate ladder… I am not smart enough for that post… but somewhere I feel like a hypocrite as I am growing where in I really don’t have answers to the simple questions in life and I sit in front of top clients and answer their technical issues…

Think about it…


__________________________Rashmi(5th October, 2011)

Jealous... Why ?

Jealous... Why ?

After a really long time was listening to Joel Osteen’s sermon… Whenever I listen to Joel I feel that the topic he talks on is always apt to my situation…

PS: Joel’s Video -

http://www.joelosteen.com/LandingPages/Pages/this_weeks_message.aspx

These days I was surrounded with talks (Especially from few of my close friends) who did speak evil just because of few success opportunities I was blessed with… Frankly speaking… “That Hurt”… It just kept me wondering that in the past when they had got the same opportunity all I could do was smile and say, ‘ They deserve this… for all the hard work they have done’… then why wasn’t it true in my case… I wondered…

Strangled with all these thoughts I went on to view Joel Osteen’s video… and he was talking about exactly same topic… all he said was …. God will always bless you for your hard work… and with this blessing (success) will arise jealous friends and back bitters… you will def will see true face of your friends… until you have not got that promotion… until you haven’t got that hike… until you haven’t got that amazing opportunity that will take you to places… your friends will be there…. But the moment you get all of these… your friends will start talking… some will say “He/She didn’t deserve it”…. Some will say, “I am so happy for you” but deep down they are broken by your success… if you have such friends… its time you find some new friends… some true friends… friends who will be there with you in your highest high and in your lowest low…

I know it hurts to know that your friends are thinking evil… But that does not mean that you feel guilty to accept Gods blessing… those friends just saw the end of the movie…. They saw the end result… they just saw that “You got the opportunity”…. But what they failed to see the first part of the movie… the struggles you lived… the price you have already paid… so its waste of time thinking about all that… people will talk … back bitters will rise… the moment they see you going up the ladder… this does not mean you grow arrogant or proud… just with humility accept Gods Blessing and pray for your friends… if they are true friends they will stick around… if they are not sooner or later they will move on anyways…

Joel mentioned one small story about his life… few years back he wanted to buy 2 acres land where in he could build his dream house… he even got one…. But he was feeling guilty to take it… thinking it is more than he needs… so he decided not to go for it…. Then one day he was travelling by plane and he was enjoying the view on his window seat… and suddenly he heard a strong voice telling him… that “guess what.. from up above here that 2 acre land looks like a small dot to me… its just a small small thing for me…. Then why you feeling guilty to take it…. Its my gift…. For me its nothing to give you that… why don’t you take it”… he knew immediately that it was God talking to him… Friends for God… 100 acre of land or that promotion or that success is a smallest little thing that he could give… so never feel guilty to take it if God gives it to you… but yes don’t run after it like a dog… don’t keep praying for it… don’t keep doing hundred rituals to get that … God will laugh at you if you behave like that… a 1 crore flat from heaven looks like a dot to Him…. And he can just give it to anyone who seeks God with all his heart and all his soul… He needs to see a true heart not a greedy heart running after these things instead of looking out for God….

All things will follow… just do your deeds well… things will fall into place… God can make roads of gold.... don’t ever under estimate Him….

But things will always happen in “HIS” time…

To all my friends – “God Bless” :)


___________________________Rashmi(2nd October, 2011)

Absconded Or Not...

Absconded or Not_________________________________

So “Pit Stop” is about to end today…. The fuel tanks have been refilled… Worn out tyres replaced… Bought a new helmet…. yeh it had been completely wrecked after the accident … Which one ;)… lol… You all should have known what I am talking about by now… ;) …. Hope my little brain is not damaged… It is or not I will come to know once I see if I can still work with same efficiency as earlier :P… Not that I did anything gr8 in my previous proj… ;) … but people think I did… and I hate to argue so didn’t bother to convince them otherwise ;)

My 7 day long long weekend was just amazing… not that I did some “breathe-taking” away task …. That all would come running after me to ask my autograph or something…But I loved just living these 7 days without “Deadlines”… I have never spent my vacations at home… its not that bad after all… I slept and ate and watched movies… again slept and ate…. :P…. it was a kind of vacations when you have the liberty to lose the sense of time… to watch back to back movies… you don’t have to bother about replying to an email waiting in our inboz…. You get up at 1 in the afternoon and the only troubling question facing you is “Mannn… which is the next movie you gonna watch ;)”…. And to top the list… your melodramatic mom does not look at you with moist eyes that says, “C’mon you are getting old… please get married” :p

I watched “Bodyguard”… Silence…Knock Knock.. I know you guys are already yelling out there saying “whats wrong with her… is she out of her mind or something”…. Btw missed telling… I watched it in a theatre…. :P… mann now I am even more scared to listen to your comments…. But the shocking part is I cried a little while watching it… yeh yeh… I am 25 year old grl… and I cried… But some part of the movie did touch me…. Why do Indian lovers have to keep their feelings bottled up inside… even up there God must be yelling from above.. “C’mon don’t wait for signs… He is the one… go ahead… tell him”… but no… Indian love stories have a duration of 2-3 yrs of separation before they confess their love… pheww !!!

As its customary to make a set of targets before you start a new life :P…. yeh for me its gonna start from tomorrow... I will go to work regularly … you gotta watch this one.. sacchi (Truly)I wll do it… I will keep my room cleaner… it looks like a hurricane tore through it right now… The only things in place are the walls right now ;)… anything they hold between themselves is so disorganized “INCLUDING ME”… yeh… that reminds me … I need to re-organize myself…. And I need to think about my future… pheww.. scary… I am not a gr8 planner…. Before deciding what kind of guy I wanna marry… Mann that’s the last task in the list before I die… but before that I need to be more considerate towards my parents I feel… In my rush rush filled life… they have been neglected… I really don’t pay much attention to their conversations… I really didn’t… while I was busy at work… I just used to kinda rush through the conversation without much attention… That’s the only one thing that tops my guilt list right now ;)…

So… Like it or not…here I come… ;)…

__________________________Rashmi (6th September, 2011)

PS: For all those who are wondering… “We thought she has absconded and gone for good…”… Hard luck guys… I will be back tomorrow… ;)

How I Wish...

How I Wish____________________________

I wish I could just do - “Spell Check”…

The spells, fowl words I could erase,

Would just remove their trace,

Inappropriate says that left few hurt,

Those that left scarred relations, wasn’t worth…

I wish I could just do – “Edit”...

Unwanted happenings I would seek,

Which hurt, those who were meek,

Awkward situations I would find,

And try to alter them and rewind…

I wish I could just do –“Cut Copy Paste”...

I would copy-paste all moments that made me smile,

Those that left me oh so happy for a while,

Also would cut all those moments that moist my eyes,

And left me standing in front of infinite whys…

I wish I could just do – “Save”...

I would save the times that touched me,

The day when I changed from me to “we”,

I would see these when I am down,

So that my spirit gets lifted while I am alone…

I wish I could just do – “Search”...

I would search my lost amigos,

My childhood dreams,

Forgotten school time crush,

Oh… this buried feeling of rush ;)

I wish I could just do –“Delete”… “Shift Delete”...

If not me, then my memory,

Me… I will be just fine… don’t worry,

Also those verses of praises I wrote for you,

I would delete them all, and make your heart all new…

Above all, I wish I could just do –“Format”...

Not my heart, but yours,

And wean it from all the undue fears,

So that it can forget my love,

And can give someone else a chance somehow…

Truly… How I wish I could just "Format" everything in your heart…

__________________Rashmi(2nd September, 2011)

Go-Live

Go-Live__________________________________

Clicked on Outlook,

With an email I just shook,

Subject Line read – “SAP-UK- Successful Go- Live”,

One Motto for which almost last 1 year I did strive…

Surprisingly I did notice,

The email was devoid of bliss,

It didn’t make me smile,

Neither did it make me happy for a while…

Client appreciation email,

Company’s President’s words in the trail,

Management’s thank you’s I see,

But all fail to make me glee…

Immediately, I closed my eyes,

Strangled with so many why’s,

Was it worth it, some voice asked me,

I really don’t have answer to that, I plea…

Endless working hours each day,

Weekend’s also slogging in every way,

Preview of the journey left me wondering,

Lost peace, which I failed to bring…

How can I forget the graveyard shift?

This project’s blessed gift,

Holiday plans that I missed on,

I do feel I have lost, whereas today for the world I have won…

Project granted a Canada trip,

So, get set go… was all set to be whipped,

Mann… nightmare was the journey,

I am now safe guys, don’t worry…

Philippines trip was a blessing in disguise,

Trust me, 100% true, no lies,

Met some genuine souls there,

Only that occasion makes me happy somewhere…

Hours turned into days,

Days turned into months somehow,

Aiming to reach the go-live date,

Oh, the endless wait…

And today – the most awaited moment is right there,

Then why no feeling of happiness anywhere,

Seriously, why am I sad, when I should be happy,

Wondering as I am typing away this poem on my lappy…

But few things I did gain…

After all, this journey wasn’t a total vain…

But I do have reasons to smile as well,

Project release achieved, today to all I can tell,

Endless friendship gained indeed,

These friends will also agree, as they read…

Some masks also came down you see,

Infinite faith in few people also flee,

Still wonder, how a silly proj can make people change,

In order to save ones job, people do become strange…

Some chord in me did struck a lot,

At least today I know, what my priority is “Not”,

No experience is waste they say,

So true, in every way…

_____________________Rashmi (1st September, 2011)

PS: Few friends I will never forget in this journey of mine...

@Bhennie...

Thanks for being there... more than a team member, thanks for being my sister and friend... It was indeed a blessing to know you my dear.... I still remember the words you once told me... Thank you Bhennie :)

"Thank you Rashmi. I found the essence of love and friendship in the workplace even in different cultures. McCain is a success not because we made it to production. It was a success because we learned a lot, laughed a lot, cried a lot... Fell and rose together... :)"

@ Fabian...

It was a blessing to know you too my friend... More than a team member it was a blessing to know you as my brother in Christ :)

@ Nikki....

You have been a sweetheart my dear... thank you for being there... hope we will still be in touch.... yeah and someday I will surely see you again... if not in Canada... then somewhere else :) for sure...

@Al,

Got really less time to know you.... but knowing you was also a blessing... :)... Convey my regards to your family :)... Keep praying... and i will also pray for u.. now that you are part of Customer Master module :)

@Jayson,

Thank you buddy for being rock solid around... Trust me without you this wouldnt have been possible....Bhennie one day asked me... can you give me one name who can be as efficient as Jayson... and my answer was "None" .... ;).... Also, thank you also for being an amazing host during my stay in Manila.. :)

Thank you all for making this mini roller coaster ride worth travelling..... :)

Love you All...

Rashmi

Be Patient... Be Patient

Be Patient... Be Patient___________________________

Longed to be

Self dependent

Free
Then,

Parents said…

Be Patient… Be Patient…

Longed to see

The Corporate

Busy Life

Then,

Friends said...

Be Patient… Be Patient…

Longed to Travel

See the world

Feel Free

Then,

Bro said...

Be Patient… Be Patient…

Longed to find

True love

Pure love

Then,

My heart said...

Be Patient… Be Patient…

Longed to move on

Feel free

From pain of a broken heart

Then,

My Same heart said...

Be Patient… Be Patient…

Longed to get away

From my work

Busy life

Then,

My boss said...

Be Patient… Be Patient…

Longed to find

A place to breathe

Heaven

Then,

Finally God Said…

Be Patient… Be Patient…

____________________Rashmi(1st September, 2011)

How Nice it Would Be...

How Nice It Would Be______________________________

After reading(living) a tragic love novel,

A Silent whisper waits for me to tell,

If they could just make it through,

If they would keep faith and not get blue…

How nice it would be…

The dreams we see each night,

Those that disappear in daylight,

If we could just be a kid again and realize,

And tell -“Dreams do come true”,

To all those who are wise…

How nice it would be…

People call and talk for a reason,

We see them change in different season,

If they paid a visit without any motive,

Each moment with us they do live…

How nice it would be…

Simple verses which an insane like me,

Understands in few seconds you see,

If wise men around could understand the same pain,

And not let their life be a vain…

How nice it would be…

Hypocrisy, everywhere is so common,

New mask we see each day, that makes us stun,

If they could realize, all would be “OK” with the real you,

And it’s really easy to be you, even if it means hurting a few…

How nice it would be…

Friends these days are seen in diff time zone,

They look busy to answer their phone,

If they would realize, what they are missing today,

And the cost they are paying for a secured tomm somehow…

How nice it would be…

___________________Rashmi(1st September, 2011)