For All Of You Friends

Just heard this video flying on 'Facebook'... Just loved it... Hence sharing the same...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qQPYstQsFiU&feature=player_embedded#

Love___________________________Rashmi  :)

Technically "Alive"

This Goes to All my Friends... Sorry for being Off Track...

Technically “Alive” …

Feels heaven typing in this blog all over again… not sure if you guys share the mutual feeling ;) … or ur hearts are just yelling… “Wapis aagayi… We thought she is gone for good” …

Now, I really would like to provide a set of fully furnished apartments to homeless Spider someday, but for now, I request Mr. Spider and his family to vacate the cobwebs threading through this blog, for I am clearing them…

Yeah all… Technically “I am alive”…

Last 2 weeks udd hi gayee… with mom dad not around… Plus work load of mine which would officially rate me as the only girl who works in double shift… with no shift allowance… no awesome salary… yeah just client appreciation mails that keeps her going…. Damnn…

One sad part of these 2 weeks was that my vacations got reduced… 6 days se 3 days karwa diya client nee… damnn… my manager said try working late so that the client does not cancel the other three days… I gave her the look that said…. “C’mom… get real… there are only 24 hours in a day… and I am already working from 9 am to 11 pm” …

To top it I asked for 10 resources for my project… my director did give me in one go… but I was so shocked… resources from Teradata (Philippines)… mann… now 3 time zone main kaam karna padega… India Canada And Philippines… And to top it they expect me to fly to Philippines and give them KT… Phew… Forget lets just dump the work topic…

Let’s start with word of apology… I am not good with apologies... But let me give it a shot...mann I will soon be given an award for maximum “Sorry’s” said… Well this apology goes to all my friends with whom I talk on daily basis and haven’t been able to be on track with that …. So Sorry Manju, Sorry Rancho, Sorry Maddu, Sorry Chrys … Indeed have been off track lately... …

Being a movie freak… guess what I haven’t watched a single movie in the last 2 weeks… I know I know… don’t repeat that… I am already on this guilt trip…

Although there is no denying that the “Dilli Dilli” track from “No One Killed Jessica has completely captured my heart . Although as per my colleagues , carrying it as my ring tone is not a very helpful tool to climb the corporate ladder . I am told that ki Rashmi , corporate world mein , you need to have more distinguished ringtones . You know , something more smooth and definitely English ... And if the lyrics are along the lines of ‘My boss looks like a cross between Leo Di Caprio and Brad Pitt’ , he would surely be happier during your appraisal… But who cares… I love the Dilli Song…

Doubt:

At times these techies make me feel like we belong to some diffrent planet or something  or we belong to some diffrent species...by including the words "CORPORATE WORLD" in most of their converations... Is it something as always I alone feel or you guys feel the same ;)... Vote now... ;)

And , one movie which I am looking forward to is ‘Dil Tho Baccha Hai Ji’ … With all its colorful promos and catchy music , I am all geared up with my popcorn bag… Please don’t say it’s a “Flop”… Because come wat may I am going ;)

But seriously man , I missed talking to you guys . Kya din the na wo bhee….oye hoye , sentimental na ho Kakke , what I mean is that it is so comforting talking to people who can not reply immediately… you can just go on and on u see ;)

So now that the cobwebs have cleared up a bit and the spider family has gone to court , ( man , I am reminded of those hindi fillum scenes where the builder comes in to “Basti Khaali Karane ke liye” ) , I think I will try to utilize my Sunday after this public apology is personal apology... Time to call my friends now.... Cya 


_________________________Rashmi(30th January, 2011)

PS: Btw mom and dad back home…. Yupieee… its such an awesome feeling you get up in the morning and to see your mom right in front of you smiling…. : ) ...

Btw I got to give you all a great news… Nahh not now… All you single guys don’t worry I am not getting married… Stay Tuned…. Jaldii hi good news reveal karungii ;)

Death or An Eye Opener

 Death or An Eye Opener_____________________________

Hmm… well all in serious thoughts today… Due to some conversation I had with a friend of mine… At times life of few people look “Perfect” to us… Maybe they are… but have you given a deep thought “Maybe” They are “Not”...

These days somewhere God is getting me to talk to people who are ready to share their life’s dark secrets… and it makes me go in a different world of thoughts… Just listing down few incidences that has struck the deepest chord in me… and made me think in levels I have never thought before… These are people who matter to me the most… as when I am not able to deal with few things,I think of them… somewhere miraculously a strange energy just comes in me to go on with things… Thank you all for being a part of my life…

Just had a conversation with a friend of mine who is currently working as a Business Analyst… he has compelted his masters course in UK and I always wondered what is he doing in India… So yesterday I just asked him casually about this… and he replied,

“Fate it seems had a plan of its own. while i was studying der, my father was diagnosed with a rare neurological disease for which der was no cure...not even proper medicines. so i came back as soon as i finished the course and was taking care of him but unfortunately cudnt do much for him...he passed away in April 2009… after this i cudnt leave my mom alone and go back to UK, so started looking for a job here in India”

Just thought to myself… At times things are so unpredictable… I had a friend who was aspiring to do his MS… wanted to settle in US… but unfortunately his mom expired… but he did go on to do his MS leaving his father in India… he has also lost his younger brother when we were in college… and he belongs to a super rich family… but still he had this US craze… just thought why do people's priorities go for toss… why do you earn i wonder… for your loved ones… and when your loved ones need you … you just can go on with your plans… we need to halt… and think…

Death, you know . Hmm how would you know… ok have you heard of the same… But have you ever thought what that moment must be like …And you know , what I am thinking about is that moment , that moment which is sitting delicately at the end of the road called life as it ends , yet opens up into the unknown chasm called death . That moment , when I will be on the verge of being lifted by death , and I will know in my heart “Shit yaar , yeh end hai , ab picchar baaki nahi hai mere dost” . Now no “Dawa ya Dua” can save me ! No people , no movies , no cars , no boss , no relationships , no money , no smiles , no mamma’s voice, no fights , no competitions , no career , no TV , nothing , after the event called Death …

That moment , when I will know in my heart , that irrespective of my willingness to go or not , I would be gone next moment . In that moment , I imagine myself to feel guilty about the heart I broke , happy about the smile I brought on a face , sad about the moment I should have told my mother I loved her but did not , proud of the moment I believed in someone and stood by him , happy about the times I spent laughing with my friends , grateful for the moments somebody knew me as I am and accepted me , heartbroken about being a daughter lesser than a daughter I should have been . And just experiencing a little of that moment by writing about it , I am shocked by how easily do I forget what really matters ...

Kitni choti choti baton par senti ho jaati hoon main ! I mean , how easily do I forget that I am going to die and a lot of stuff doesn’t really matter . How easily do I forget that however blind I may try to be to my reality , that moment will thrust the sum of deeds in my face without leaving me with an escape route . How easily do I allow myself to lose perspective and be drowned in the useless ego fights , pointlessly hurting the very people I love , choosing not to express my love just because I think I can do that later , Bahut time bacha hai soch soch ke…. How easily I forget the impending arrival of that last moment , and as a result , how easily I forget what really matters during the moments I have between now and that moment . How easily do I let myself be scared by the insecurities of a life unknown and continue to suffer a situation I don’t enjoy when that moment will snatch away whatever fake securities I build around myself . How easily I shut up my heart and listen to all the voices around me , when in the end , the only voice I will have to hear is the voice of my heart . How easily I forget death , and thus , how easily I forget how to live . I mean , sometimes I really need this perspective check and get out of the holed up thinking and view life in a more cool manner ...

Broken promises I think about now… my God… I wll soon be registered to Guniess book of records for “Maximum promises Broken”

Me to my Mom: Yes mom… we will pakka go out this weekend… (One promise down)

Me to my dad… Yes Dad .. I will try coming home early today (Another goes down)

Me to my Bro: Yes Bro… lets just sit down and talk (Yet another goes in the drain)

Me to my friends : Yeh surely we will catch up someday ( And the day never comes )

List goes on…

Yeah I will call you back… Right now in a meeting…

Yeah I will reply to your email “soon”… that soon never comes….

‘
‘
List of my “Broken Promises” … does it match with yours too …. : )

We have taken people in our life for ease… be it a friend you know for ages… or a friend just a day ago…. Ye log kaha jaa rahe hai… they will always we there… right now other priorities are at stake… and what are those priorities… my work… my job… my boss… my onsite… my home loan… my new flat… my car loan… my investments… list here also goes on… and will go on till you meet the moment called “Death”…

“Life” is nothing but these little moments people… its right here.. this very moment… the moment which just passed by just a sec ago while you are reading this blog… its not in the future unseen… its not in tomorrow… its made up of these little tiny miny moments we live each day… don’t wreck it… Keep your little promises you make to people… don’t take people in your life for granted… maybe you know these people since ages or for a day or so… but they matter… don’t let go of them… Do it before Life let goes of you…

___________________________Rashmi(23rd January,2011)

Ps: I know Sunday morning is not good a time to think of a topic as serious as death… But the discussion with my friend just made me think this deep… Chalo time for some cooking shooking… mom dad not in town :( … so bro wil have to bear with my cooking…. ;) …. Yeah yeah… stop laughing now… I am not that bad a cook yaaronn… ;)…

60 Tips

60 Tips ________________________By Robin Sharma

1. Exercise daily.

Ps: At times its good to feel fit ;)

2. Get serious about gratitude.

Ps: Return value of gratitude... Its way too high... Just give it away :)

3. See your work as a craft.

Ps: Be passionate about your work... As the tag line of Blackberry says... Do what you love... Love what you do ;)

4. Expect the best and prepare for the worst.

Ps: I follow this fundaa yaar... Be prepared for the worst and do anything and everything with a bindaas attitude... One life u got ya... give it your best shot... Take risks...

5. Keep a journal.

Ps: Well this helps... Keep noting things that happens on your daily basis.... feels good when few days or years down the lane you read the same and laugh at how seriously you took some things which was not even worth it ;)

6. Read “The Autobiography of Your Hero”.

Ps: For this first u got to find a Hero... well for me "God" is my best Hero... Bible works for me... ;)

7. Plan a schedule for your week.

Ps: At times planning does help ;)...

8. Know the 5 highest priorities of your life.

Ps: This is very important... Try doing this... Kuch sujhta hi nahi hai.... as in if we avoid being hypocrit for once we get to know what we are running after does not even fall in the top 5 priorities...

9. Say no to distractions.

Ps: Throw away all things/people who are nothing but distractions....

10. Drink a lot of water.

Ps: Health yaaronn... ;)

11. Improve your work every single day.

Ps: How monotonous can one get ya... be innovative...

12. Get a mentor.

Ps: Techies, this does not mean catch hold of a mentor at work... mentor can be ur mom.. can be ur dad.. can be your bro.. or just a stranger at times :)

13. Hire a coach.

Ps: No clue what Robin wants to say ;)

14. Get up at 5 am each day.

Ps: Mann this is hard... i tried this... for a month... phew... now 6 is the target... ;)

15. Eat less food.

Ps: Does not apply to me... i dont wanna be gayab soon ;)

16. Find more heroes.

Ps: Yeah.... try finding someone u can look up to... some " Strong Headed" people... well but dont get carried away from their life... they too can make mistakes....

17. Be a hero to someone.

Ps: It feels good when someone comes up to you and says... "I love your attitude towards life" ... well I have been blessed in this area... told u long back... i just cant be humble... my modesty is dead by now... yeah i love to mention if someone praises me .... ;)

18. Smile at strangers.

Ps: Well this kinda does not apply in India somehow... A guy smiling at another stranger guy might just throw some weird signal... so appply this is US ...

19. Be the most ethical person you know.

Ps: Everybodys ethical levels varies... But try abiding with 1 or 2 ethics you claim to have in every situation....

20. Don’t settle for anything less than excellence.

Ps: Well no comments on this... i beleive all times excellence does not count...

21. Savor life’s simplest pleasures.

Ps: 10 on 10 for this .... enjoy yaa... every moment.... simple things...

22. Save 10% of your income each month.

Ps: Yea... agreed

23. Spend time at art galleries.

Ps: No compulsion.... depends on ur intrest...

24. Walk in the woods.

Ps: Hmm... sounds good...

25. Write thank you letters to those who’ve helped you.

Ps: I tried this... in LnT we had this "Thank You" Day... I wrote thank u letters to so many people that i won the prize of writing max thank u cards... its good... :)

26. Forgive those who’ve wronged you.

Ps: Chadoo yaaroon... kitna dil main rakhoge.. maaf kardooo sabkoo

27. Remember that leadership is about influence and impact, not title and accolades.

Ps: Cool one....

28. Create unforgettable moments with those you love.

Ps: :) :) :)

29. Have 5 great friends.

Ps: Try listing down 5 frinds u can call "Friends for Life"

30. Become stunningly polite.

Ps: Indeed... no one takes advantage of people who are good.. its just a reason given by people who dont wanna be good ;)

31. Unplug your TV.

Ps: LOL

32. Sell your TV.

Ps: 10/10 for that again

33. Read daily.

Ps: Indeed.... Read anything... daily.. kuch nahi tho mera blog tho padh lo... gyaan bhara granth bann raha hai ;)

34. Avoid the news.

Ps: Yeah... why start ur day with news of accidents... failed marriages... property news... phew... get some life dude...

35. Be content with what you have.

Ps: This generation is running... so it will take time for this content thing ;)

36. Pursue your dreams.

Ps: C'mon too late now... start doing what u dream abt...

37. Be authentic.

Ps: Yeh... kab tak will u wear that mask... be authentic...

38. Be passionate.

Ps: No cost for this.. free hai... try karke dekho... accha lagta hai...

39. Say sorry when you know you should.

Ps: Ego baaju main rakho... and sorry bol daalo ji ;)

40. Never miss a moment to celebrate another.

Ps: Life is a race.. nahhh life is a party :)... celebrate life....

41. Have a vision for your life.

Ps: Yeah... get out of your problems... my life.. my family... my work... my promotion... my office politics... mann... you will never get time to look up at the sky... dream big... make ur vision wide..

42. Know your strengths.

Ps: Wel i beleive this is  a continous process... strenghts over takes weaknes once you are matured...

43. Focus your mind on the good versus the lack.

Ps: Samjha nai mereko :(

44. Be patient.

Ps: Phew... mere main thoo ye Crash Coruse called "Life" ne laa daalaa patience :)

45. Don’t give up.

Ps: thts fine re... dont beat urself over it... its "OK" to give up at times

46. Clean up your messes.

Ps: Yup dont beat over failed relations.. failed dreams... fast track ur life... move on...

47. Use impeccable words.

Ps: Does not cost anything again

48. Travel more.

Ps: Yeahhh... one thing i wanna do

49. Read “As You Think”.

Ps: Again.. nahi saamjha :(

50. Honor your parents.

Ps: Surely do...

51. Tip taxi drivers well.

Ps: US wallon ke liye applicable ;)

52. Be a great teammate.

PS: Love your team and your team shall love you ;)

53. Give no energy to critics.

Ps: Chadoo critics ko... celebrities only get critics all around them ..;)

54. Spent time in the mountains.

Ps: Dont go to himalayas for that now... just spend time with urself... peacefully..

55. Know your top 5 values.

Ps: Believe in few things strongly...

56. Shift from being busy to achieving results.

Ps: Busy Busy Busy... stop running yaa...

57. Innovate and iterate.

Ps: Alll you techies.. innovation tho bhul hi gaye ho...

58. Speak less. Listen more.

Ps: Spend time with urself and others...

59. Be the best person you know.

Ps: Never give up on the person ur...thinking acche hone ka faayda nahi hai... be your best... always

60. Make your life matter...

Ps: Dont just live for the sake of living.... make each day of your life matter to u...:)

__________Written by "Robin Sharma"

__________Beech Beech main aiwe hi Comments by "Rashmi Poojari" ;)

Back Yaaronn

Back Yaaronn_____

So , the last time I wrote something here , was a time when dinosaurs used to prance around the earth... or something nonsense had really breathed on this blog… Ok , that’s a slight exaggeration about the extent of my absence , but you get the drift… Struck by an acute case of ‘I miss her , around a dozen guys all over the country have killed themselves , another seven are being rushed to hospital as we speak , and I can’t even count the ones who are out on Friday Nite shopping for nylon ropes and rat poison pills right now . But here I am , so chill , breathe and smile , for I am still single and confused…

Anyways , a lot of water has flown under the bridge since I last wrote ( I know , my usage of English idioms is exemplary . Zabardast. )…

Clock strikes 12 as I write this blog… Don’t worry guys for a change I left at 6 PM today after almost a month…. And enjoyed Bowling followed by dinner with my friends…. Mann wat an end to a good week… Well finally after a really long long time I can say… “Kya badhyaa week thaa yaar”… I don’t say workload was any less but yaa much much organized… at times client ko bhi sunanaa padta hai boss… ;)

Yeah my client did call me in the midst of my partying mood… But listening to the surrounding noise all he said was, “Guess ur traveling… I wanted to have a meeting… but thik chee… Monday we shall talk ;) “… phew…

I knew I needed a break from office and an urgent trip to Mauritius the moment I re-read my previous post related to my wrk frustations. It looked like it had been typed by a girl aggressive enough to make Andrew Symonds look like a messenger of peace with a couple of white doves perched on his shoulders ….

Btw good good walla newss… my vacation leaves for this year got approved…with “NO” negotiations with my manager… yeah she is a sweetheart… Ding Dang Dang Ding… phew Almost 10 days off… For the first time I have taken a leave with ‘0’ plans… really… at times ist fun naa “NOT” planning few things… just going wth the flow… ;)

Bakki kya… Mom dad outta Mumbai…. Kaha… manglore yaaar… that’s the only place you will find them if not Mumbai …. Yeah indeed it should have been a hard week managing home + office… but with a bro like mine… well indeed a sweetheart…. No no seriously.. . hamesha mazaak nahi karti hun yaar…. Not being sarcastic at all… indeed week was busy… but yet gr8…

Weekend is gonna be fun …. My friends have come down from outta India… its gonna be a good good walla get together mann… “Dhobighat” movie plan on the chart…..bakki 26th jan holiday next week… and from 28th me on vacations…. Feels like heaven… :)

Chaloo… let me rhyme few lines here …

At times its easy to live each day,
One at a time in every way,
Forget all worries for a moment or so,
You will miss these moments spent in tensions later yaaron…

Whoa ! Chill Yaaro . There was a bunch of really verbal Punjabi dogs right outside my window at 1 in the morning , and since they wont let me sleep , decided to see if I can rhyme words . So chill . It takes something as grave as back to back screenings of Karz and Phoonk to depress me . And all the angry guys commenting here , You are always fun to have around …

Cheers,
Rashmi

Not Yet...

Just had a conversation with an old friend of mine... she was in a relationship with a guy... But the guy wasn't strong enof to be with her when problems surrendered... She moved on .... went on to marry another guy and is now happy with her husband.... after ages the other guy came back expecting her to be still there... But she had moved on.. Just selected ths plot to rhyme few lines...

Not Yet____________________________________

I feel safe here,
Please don’t come near,
I am happy enjoying life’s tone,
Please don’t enter my zone…

I know, one day,
I'll have to break open the shell,
But,
Not yet...

I am ok for sure,
Please move on my dear,
I am not yet ready to face the real,
Please don’t make me deal with my fear…

I know, one day,
I'll have to break open the shell,
But,
Not yet...

I am happy being back home,
Please don’t think I am alone,
I know I was running since long,
Please be assured now nothing is wrong…

I know, one day,
I'll have to break open the shell,
But,
Not yet...

I am enjoying music called life,
Please remember now I am someone’s wife,
I know it’s hard for you to take,
Please forget me, do forsake …

I know, one day,
I'll have to break open the shell,
But,
Not yet...

I am no longer your’s you know,
Please move on, don’t be so low,
You were inside me someday,
Please forgive me now in all way…

I know, one day,
I'll have to break open the shell,
But,
Not yet...

I know you will find some one new,
Please don’t ever get blue,
Any girl will be lucky to be in your life,
Please do give her the honor to be your beloved wife…

Even if you have other priorities at stake,
Please abide by the promises you make,
Never ever leave her,
Please be with her, now and forever...

As for me…

I know the day has come,
To feel free, and be with my “Beloved One”
Now I am all set,
No longer do I remember you… Not yet…

_______________________Rashmi (17th January,2011)

I am dumb… Totally Dumb

I am dumb… Totally Dumb...

The distance between “Sensible Thoughts” and “Me” is so far that it would make the distance between “Moon” and the “Earth” sound near… Indeed… But today I had a zabardast discussion about “Love” or you can say “People In Love” with one of my friend…

Few days back , while returning home from work , me and my friends stopped by at Cafe Coffee Day...And sitting there and chomping on a vegetable sandwich , I looked around at all the "couples" who sat around me...Holding hands...Shy smiles….Loud giggles...People in "love" maybe...

Love… As in, the "boy-girl" love…Ok….ladies first…As in the "girl-boy" love…

If you shifted to earth very recently, I can understand….But if you have been around on this planet for anything more than 15 minutes , you would have heard this word… “Love”... For a bollywood director , "Love" must be the greatest invention ever , right next to fire and wheel.To spot a UFO while on your way to office tomorrow is easier than spotting a movie which does not involve the deadly trio - boy , girl , love…

My friend says he is in "love" with the girl who works at the second floor of his office…The other day, I saw the boy who hands out the food in our office cafeteria , with the guy who does the dishes...Maybe , they are in "love" too...(Legalized hai boss ye bhi)…Even the cyber world is bustling with desperate flirts who hope to find "love"…

And then this boyfriend-girlfriend thing…It’s like a toothbrush…You got to have one…

" Hi , I have brain cancer."
Thats ok , we all gotta die anyways...

"Hello , I got limphoosirkoma of the intestine."
Chill , Rajesh Khanna in "anand" had it too.

"Namaste , my house burned down last night."
Arre tension nahi yaar , these things happen.

"Hey , I dont have a boyfriend."
What ! Why did not you tell me about this ? Oh poor girl, everything will be fine.God can be real cruel sometimes...

People I am not here to make fun of people in “love”… but I feel there are two different aspects...To love someone…And to be loved…It is said "to be loved" is a natural need…And for me , its a “need” and not “love”...As long as you want this person or need this person , you dont love him , you love yourself and want "to be loved"…Love is not meant to be a selfish thing…Love is much harder and selfless than that…To love is not to wish for someone to be with oneself , but to give up oneself for that someone...Love is not in sharing coconut water on some beach, but in staying thirsty if it helps him…Love is not in him coming to you , but to care for him when you know he would not come to you…

For me , love's beauty is in being so consumed with it , that you forget your pains and smile , just because he smiled somewhere , aware of your existence no longer…

Love is not about wanting him , but wanting his happiness , with you or without you…

I am no authority...I am no love guru with the sagacious face and the halo around my head...I am no headmaster of the "Institute of Love Matters" ( ILM.doesnt sound bad ).Infact I am more like someone who flunked brutally in this zone… But the way love is seen as some "coochie-coochie-valentines-gift-holding hands" concept leaves me feeling funny...Love is hard...Love is not a punishment which leaves you restless…But it is something which makes you feel a bliss in a punishment , just because he is happy…

I am not looking at any roses placed between yellowed pages…And I do not wish to insult anyone's feelings…Just that I feel, that to love someone is supposed to be something very deep and heartfelt, that when you say "I love you" to a guy , realise the responsibility and commitment it stands for... Its not about you anymore...Its about him...And I am not trying to preach anything here , please...Just that I felt something ,and wrote it….And if I dont make sense , and you wonder what's the problem with me - see the title to the post… ;)

_________________________Rashmi(16th January,2011)

Happiness

Happiness_______________________________________

Someone asked me today,
What does happiness mean to you?
Made me think in a way,
Maybe it’s a feeling oh so new…

Happiness is being home again,
Happiness is walking in the rain,
Happiness is to see my humble home,
Happiness is to sit, and not roam…

Happiness is family to me,
Happiness in the faces I longed to see,
Happiness is no longer to flee,
Happiness is once more being free…

Happiness is my feeling oh so high,
Happiness is seen in the inside,
Happiness is indeed quite rare,
Happiness at times is barely there…

Happiness is when my mamma calls,
Happiness is when I see the waterfalls,
Happiness is when I see a little kid smile,
Happiness is when I forget all worries for a while…

Happiness is spending time with your love,
Happiness is talking for hours somehow,
Happiness is being with someone forever,
Happiness is the thought that he will leave you never…

Happiness is when the past memories brings tears,
Happiness is when one hug makes you forget all your fears,
Happiness is being what I want to be,
Happiness is being just “Me” …

So, tell me what Happiness means to you,
Can you write it down in a word or two?
For me the list of Happiness can go on and on,
But who has the patience to read it for long ;)

_________________________Rashmi (16th January, 2011)

“No One Killed Jessica"

No One Killed Jessica______________________________


Well had a very argumentative week in office… with whom… well with my friend come manager… Teradata was looking like a “Walk in the Park” for me until this year end…

I was oh so proud when my manager assigned me to this new project…. Out of 30 + team just 2 people were selected for this new project… I was on the top of the world… But little did I sense the upcoming thunder…My new project was indeed driving me nuts… late night sittings had started since Jan… I know… what a start to the new year… Laga initial phase of the proj demands late nite sittings…. But ghanti tab baji when one nite I came home at mid night… and in my sleep all night… all I could see was Project issues… sleepless nights mannn… tab laga…. Bahut hogaya…

For 2 weeks I had not attended any personal calls… had not spoken to my parents and bro… I was like what the heck… this cant go on… aisa hi karna tha tho I would have stayed back in LnT…

As always I thought time for some revolution now… when the client is demanding a team of 10+ then why are just 2 people working… I called upon a meeting with my manager this week, and told her…

“Why don’t we hire donkeys for this work… there is no innovation being done…. We are not getting any growth be it functional or technical… yeah but the resources are getting burned down in the very start of the project… if this goes on… I back off from this project… I cant work in a project that is nothing but a mess… and not well planned… and with the resource count you are giving me I don’t commit to any deliverables from my end”

I thought the manager will be angry… But guess what… she smiled… and said…

 “This is what I love about you… you are just so straight forward, and u don’t make unnecessary commitments… you tell me the issue… very openly”

Finally, with this “Dhamki” of backing off my manager assigned 2 lateral resources… one 8 year experienced guy from Cap Gemini … and other 4 year experienced from my very old LnT gang…. Phew…now I can apply for some leaves… my aim accomplished ;) … and my team will also not spend late nights in office anymore….

C’mon yaaronn… I was waiting for this month end for my long long vacations… dec is the time normally when I take this long leaves but then my Teradata Certification didn’t let me do that too… and now this project… life naam ki cheez hai ki nahi …

My friends in office said ,

“Yaar rashmi, only u could just be this straight forward with the manager…. We cant just go and tell the managers all this… esp when it comes to resource requirement…” I told them… “Bolna seekho…. Think what worse can happen… be prepared for the same and say what you think is right”

On my way back home with my manager I did apologize for being a little blunt though.. all she said was… “I Understand … you just said what was getting too much for you to take… so just relax… I am ok with the meeting we had today"… ( Thought to myself...phew…apprisal time main I did try a big time stunt as always again today... I wont be surprised if i get less hike this year ;) )

So finally Saturday arrived… I watched the movie “No one killed Jessica” … mann what a movie… indeed the most wrong time to watch such a heavy movie when I should have caught some Jim Carry movie… But I could just relate to Rani Mukherjee in the movie… mann that lady’s role was simply awesome…

I love one of the dialogue in the movie she says, “ If Mumbai is about money, then Delhi is about Power… here everybody is a somebody…nobody is a nobody”…. True naa…

Sunday morning arrived… Bros bday btw guys… Happy Happy walla birthday… yeah he is getting old now.. 29 mann.. told him shaadi kar le… mere bharoose rahega tho ho gayi teri shaadii… ;) … ok ok back to the topic…

At times some things get you to halt… and “Think”… Yeah yeah thinking has been the hallmark of my existence since childhood… many would argue saying thinking has always been my hobby… my best pastime you can say… right… you are right… But very few things get me to think all day… and this incident just transformed me into a zombie for a while…

Today I conversed with a friend of mine… well not right to call a friend… just an acquaintance you can say… While conversing he mentioned that he is strong (Emotionally) … Me as always sarcastically told him that situations prove one is strong or weak…

He didn’t say anything to that… then we started discussing about his family.. to that he said,

“My dad died in 2002 in a car accident… my elder bro is suffering from “Schizophrenia” … which is a kind of mental disorder… he stays with my mom... they are my responsibility…maybe because of this I am still unwed till I have striked the age of 32”..

I was shocked to listen to what he had to say… he is currently in US since 5 years now… I always thought “Isske life main kya problem ho sakta hai” … and when I heard about his life all I told him was, “You are indeed strong” … he smiled and replied “I am just trying to be” …

All day I was thinking about the fact we crib about our problems… our work… even though our life is so steady… at times our vision is so very restricted to our own problems that we think everybody else is living oh so soothing life…

Never take anything too seriously… esp your work… its not worth it… so dude… tomm I have a list of things to do at work…

1. Apply for my vacations
2. Give KT to my new team members
3. Reduce the freq of daily client calls

If the client still does not understand that we are humans working in India not machines … then….

4. Back off from the project… ;)

No more work tensions anymore I promise… I called my few friends who were desperately trying to reach me since 2 weeks now… most of my friends rely on me when it comes to taking major decisions… well I am the “Agony Aunt”…. Cant help it… (yeh yeh you might think I am the one who needs help, how can I be a mentor to others) … But apun main bhi talent hai boss… aiwe hii engineer nahi bane hai... I know my examples at times are just zabardast… goshh u are right…. I indeed need help ;)

__________________________Rashmi(16th January,2011)

PS : Title of this blog has nothing to do with the content of this blog... mujhe pata tha title padhke aap log ye blog jarur padhoge .. ;) 

"I Will Be A Good Human Being"

Acha Human Banoji :)

I will respect my elders,

I will help others,

I will never lie,

I will be a 'Good Human Being’ …

Back in late eighties a little child… sitting on first bench… used to write this in her little notebook... Maybe she was bad with her grammer back then too …( oops Grammar)… she used to write “Human Beeing” instead of “Human Being”… spelling mistake all over the place… little did she know the true meaning of what it is like being a “Good human Being”… but she did write it down because her teacher asked her to do so...

Six year olds are innocent kids… they blindly believe in what the teacher says…. six year olds don’t wanna become a doctor… don’t wanna become an engineer… don’t wanna fly onsite… don’t know what 8 lac per year pay package means…all they know is that their teacher asked them to be a “Good Human Being”…

21 years later…the same child found her little book where she had written “I will be a good human being”… … the same little girl today is writing this blog … she is grown up now… she did study well… went on to become an engineer… then did enter the IT jungle… now works in one of the top US based company…

In the midst of the software engineering class, she did forget this little sentence she had written in her notebook.. maybe she didn’t forget but she didn’t care… she was running this race where people didn’t care if you are good human being…

She was more concerned about being better than others… and she did it all… she almost always topped the class… got placed in a good company… got good hike everywhere… she was so busy being better than others... faster than others…

Over the years, lotta choices came across her… no doubt 90% choices she made were wrong… Not sure what made her do this… but these choices did change her… for good indeed for a change… few pains she inherited… few she lived … few she borrowed… few broke her into zillion pieces… another million hands re-built her… phew…

Many of you might be wondering what makes me write something like as simple as “Being a Good Human Being” … well few encounters with myself… few encounters with the “Me”

Somewhere I was the same little girl back in school until I joined the corporate… My first job was driving me nuts … my personal life was falling all over the place…. My parents had forgotten what it was like talking to me as I was so much busy with my work… I had transformed into a workaholic… The types who have their cars in the office parking lot when all the other ones have left . Have taken a total of four days off since June 2007 . Monday is no more a scary day . I send out office mails almost every Sunday ...Not that I wanted to be on the cover of Times … But my work load was just not reducing… But priorities had gone for a toss…

And it’s not only about the family... I had been losing friends faster than you would lose your cool if there was a porcupine inside your pants. Most of my friends didnt call me anymore, and those who did, called me a jerk. I mean, I was being compared to a wooden chair in context of my sensitivity levels, and the wooden chair has won invariably . And to be honest, which I have seldom been, not in the college exams at least, I do not blame any of my friends, or ex-friends. I am not proud of the girl I was…

Marked the date… 26th November 2008 … Remember the terrorist attacks in Mumbai… that day was my project go-live… I was at work… 11 Pm… Mumbai was in shock due to the terror attacks… and I had no clue that ths was happening outside my office… I was busy with my client call… I saw my cell phone ringing… “Mamma Calling” it said…. I cut the call… as I was busy… then one of my friend called… I cut that call too… then I got a text msg saying … “ Rashmi please leave office… terrorist attacks have started in Mumbai” … I thought it was a joke… and was in no mood fr any jokes.. called back my friend to just let her know that it was the most wrong time for a joke… she replied saying…. "Rashmi please don’t leave office…. Kuch bhi ho sakta hai…"

Then I realized why my parents were calling… I called back mom immediately to let her know I am safe… my cab driver called me to ask if I would prefer going home in this situation or I would be staying back in office…. I asked him to get the car… jhaasi ki raani bananae ka shauk tha…. But I didn’t wanna spend any more time in office… just prayed to God to help me reach home safely… seeing me home mom hugged me and told me never to hit some stunt like that ever again….

Next day in office… "Go- live" appreciation mails were flooding in… but somewhere I was not happy… I called upon a meeting with my manager… my manager told me that I will be assigned to a new project… the EBI- support team… an all boys team until now… and he said I am the first girl to be assigned to it as he loved my capabilities in the last project… but something in me was telling me its just not right… as a fresher I told my manager that I reject your offer… I would prefer being on bench… I prefer the pink slips that are flying for people on bench… I prefer resigning … I prefer all that… bt no more of this crazy work load…told him that I can no longer put work above my personal life… my manager was shocked… he accepted my offer and put me in another development team with less workload…

One year passed… was just waiting for my bond with LnT to get over… 5th Nov 2009 my bond got over… 12th November cleared Teradata Interview… 26th November, 2009 (Exactly the same day of the terror attacks) … I resigned from LnT… My manager became a zombie… he told me "hope you remember next week you are getting increment letters… and hope you know I have plans for you to go onsite soon"… I told him… "but did u know “money” is no longer my priority… if that was the case I would have waited for your increment letters…. Would have done a better salary negotiation with Teradata"… Yes guys, I did not even negotiate with the salary they offered… in the interview all I asked them was “Hope the work culture of Teradata Corporation is good” …

While leaving LnT my manager called me in the conference room and said….

“Rashmi… you are one person I see as always smiling… keep wearing that smile… I loved your enthu in the last 2 years you have been here... and your dedication… and most important I see you are a "Good human being"… you never cribbed for hike… never did u crib for onsite… you were always this happy go lucky person… I have seen the way you have Lead your team…You did not even crib when you were made the team lead as a fresher... i  understand it was too much of a responsibility on you but you did it with a smile...your leaving is a big loss for LnT… I have not asked any of the other people who are leaving to stay back... but with u i just cant seem to let go a resource like you...any moment you wanna come back to LnT… all you would need is just one call… and the job will be yours”…

This meant a lot to me… I rememberd Robin sharmas words back then… he has written in one of his book … “Think what you want people to tell about you on your last day at work… and live your life in the company that way… “

I hate to admit this, but while giving my farewell speech in LnT I did weep… I jst could not speak anything further… I just looked at my manager and he gave me the look that said… “Stay Back” … but I had to go…

I know many will read this ... Some people who think I am not practical enough … Some people who think I will change , and probably would forget these words soon enough . Some people who think I do not have the courage to be who I say I want to be . Some people who think I do not know what I really want to be . Some people who would not understand , and will think I do not understand...

All I can say is , I know what this means to me . And I do not expect many to understand what this means to me … Friends, I am talking to that child again. Even though I do not have that little notebook today , that page has not been clearer to me before today . And I will be a good human “beeng” …Maybe not faster . Maybe not sharper …Maybe not a winner for the world ... But definitely a good human being …

PS :

Kya… Suddenly 1 year pahale ki baat kaise yaad aagaya… well one of my friend shifted to Delhi after marriage… this week was her first day at work… she told me her manager is such a good guy… he was very helpful… when she thanked him for helping her out all he said was… “All I want you to remember me as is not your boss but as a good human being”… :) … ye dialogue se flash back hua jii ;) …

So all my seen and unseen friends who follow my blog regularly, sorry for making this post sound oh so serious… At times I just get carried away… Chalo jii… Weekend hai… got my plans to watch “No one Killed Jessica” … I need to shut down my lappy now… or else with the speed my blog list is increasing, I wll surely get some chance to write some script for some movie soon… I know my modesty is dead by now ;)

Now the upcoming statement goes to my teacher back in school who made me write in the notebook what the title of this blog reads... Dear Teacher I passed... Maybe not with flying colors... Just passed the exam called "Life" with grace marks...Border line main hi sahii ;) ... But I passed... :)

Love ya,
Rashmi (15th January,2011)

Unpaid Fury

Unpaid Fury....

Lost my temper today,
Forgot all reasons in every possible way,
Not at all proud of the things I said,
Nor the consequences I paid…

Indeed my cheeks were flaming red,
The 5 mins journey I lead,
Uttered things I shouldn’t have,
Wish for once I was dead not alive….

Didn’t do a deed that was wise,
Now I got to pay a heavy price,
My impulsiveness my loved ones did bear,
How could I forget about their immense care…

I look back at the moment now,
The moment I so regret somehow,
I am sorry is all I can say,
I know cost of my fury you had to pay…

____________________Rashmi (09-January-2011)

Goshh … Arranged Marriage

Goshh … Arranged Marriage…

Well this is the most annoying and hottest topic of the “Season” … Did u hear that…. Yeahh that’s my Mahila Mandal girls yelling in the background … “I agree with you Rashmi… Finally you are writing something about the agony we girls are going thru” …

Phew… I know I am hitting the most sensitive area of all my Girl-Friends (well let me be clear…. Girls who are my friends… bass aur kuch nahii )…. Specify karna padta hai yaaroon… lotaa dirty minds around u see ;) … Well it’s not a sensitive topic because we girls want to marry… but its sensitive because our “Parents” want to see us married… ;) … well wish they wanted to see us “Happily Married”… not just “Married” …. There is a difference right ;)

While we girls were busy spending our busy life as always gossiping, traveling, enjoying… our parents thought bahut hogaya bachpana… 25 years down… now its time to hit the matrimonial site :O … Goshh… We remember when we were 18 only thing we girls used to talk about was which stream in Engineering we should go for…. When we were 21 we hit the placement jungle where in all we used to discuss was in which IT company should we be doing a crash landing ;) …. When we turned 22 all we used to discuss was my project is this this this… my onsite TL is a pain… my manager is a jack ass… When we turned 23 all we used to discuss was kitna mila yaar appraisal… 7%.... 10%... mann time for a job switch… when we turned 24 all we used to discuss was …. Bata yaar openings kaha pe haii… kitna percent hike de raha hai new company…

But now…

Now that we are 25, all we discuss is… yaar mom dad sir pe baithe hai yaar… shaadi kar karkee… c’mon there are so many better things to do apart from getting married… phew… but guess what the best part is parents ko itna tension nahi haii… but ye samaaj ye duniyaa walle … anywhere you go people ask… so when will you give us the good news… My expression goes…” Sure aunty … good news is I am flying onsite for 2 years… what’s better than that”… yeah we all girls are praying for long long onsites… money ka koi relation nahi hai onsite se… but we all have become really serious about our carriers suddenly… as our parents are thinking we aren’t serious about anything hence we should get married …. Few of my friends have also taken refuge in IIMs or some other business school… chalo issi bahane they get to live another 2 years of their lives ;) Lol… what a reason naa ;)

But the award winning dialogue was when I heard my dear friend Dhwitha yelling …

“C’mon girls, I know I am born in a gujju family… but I never hit on with any of the gujjus around me since my childhood… I don’t even hit on with my relatives…. How can my parents expect me to hit on with a gujju guy for marriage” … lol… 10 on 10 for that statement ;)

While all this was happening with in my friends lives and I was enjoying their plight and was busy killing my personal life and discovering the pathway to a life of lonely existence and talking to the pet dog I realized that mere mom dad bhi ye rat race main peeche nahi rahane walle the… they were also finding alliances for me… lol… Parents at times behave like they will get an award or something for getting their daughters married before everyone else’s…. wow…

Last month, they ran to an arranged marriage agent… God knows what criteria they mentioned but little did they know that my criterias for marriage has changed ever since my heart looks like it has met with a major accident and is recovering in an ICU or something…lol… Well , now I am a girl who is no more enamored by the external beauty and just wants a rich young/old guy ;) … Lol (Please ignore that… am just kidding…. Wish my parents don’t follow my blog)

Here I would like to mention one more award winning dialogue of my dear friend Milin… he once told me,

“Rashmi yaar ladki dhund mere liye or else my parents will do the disaster… and my criterias are very clear… she should be good looking… dekh main looks ko change nahi kar paaungaa… nature and all I can change in future ;) “ …. Lol… Clap Clap…

Ok where was I… yeah my parents running to this so called agent… wat a business naa… agent for a noble cause … uniting two hearts ;)… lol.. sorry I can really get sarcastic but I don’t wana comment much about these agents whom my parents see as “God-Sent” with an image like doves are flying around them… ;)

Chalo atleast my brother had serious reservations against this act of my parents, because he thought my profile was incomplete without the adjectives …‘She is Uncaring, Stubborn, and can kill for the TV remote” in it… Phew… Bhai hai ya dushmann ;)

Now, the problem with trying to find a husband through this route is , that unless you meet the guy , you think he is extremely good looking… (pata nai kaunsse baba aadam ke zamaane ka photo dikhaate haii… I mean , I expect no one to tell me that he looks good unless he meets me face to face) , can be in the Limca Book of Records with his talents , and is a total delight to be with ..., hates girls with their mothers alive …Not that I want a guy with or without any particular attribute , but the net problem with an arranged marriage is that people are not themselves till it may be too late to do anything about it . I mean, he may be smiling at me and thinking “I think I want to stab her with a pencil immediately.” And the same for the guy .I am sure he will have his apprehensions, which will be aggravated when he watches me throw sarcastic comments every now and then. So, the way things are going, things should get fun ...At least for you…. Lol…

And talking of shaadi , my family recently took me to this purana filmy temple . The type of temple which is talked about by ghoonghat clad women in villages , you know the "Tumne suna nahi bahin ? Uss mandir jaakar jo maango mil jaata hain." types wala temple. So while coming out of it , they saw this Pandit Maharaj who sat outside with some books and a sign that said something like "Shri Guru Maharaj Astrology Centre." And cutting short all the gory and kaali details that followed , he announced that any attempts to marry me off within next three years would be as dangerous as Mika at his birthday party. So looks like panditjee has destroyed any immediate plans of my parents for me , and I will continue to be the most eligble bachelor in my colony…. Lol… (Chalo that 1000 bucks given to the pandiiji did work) … hehe….

Phew… weird zone naa… But the best part right now is we all girls pay package is way too high and that has helped us reject 99.99% of the profiles coming our way… lol… c’mon we cant help it if these guys cant even earn 50% as much as we do… phew…

This reminds me of one more award winning dialogue…

My friend just took a switch to a new company which resulted in her pay package just hitting around 7-8 lac per annum … she told me for the first time her mom was not all that happy with the progress of her 25 year old daughter…. Her mom said, “ 4 lac ke package main ladka nahi mil raha tha… ab 8 lac package main tho ho gayi teri shaadi” … lol…

My god… ab shaadi ke liye we girls cant even go for a job switch… lol… So this is the plight of girls these days… now you know why you find girls fighting with their managers for onsite… paise waise ka koi tension nahi hai… break chahiye yaaroonnn….

In fact, talking of marriage, the more I learn, the more I believe that a marriage needs to be lived through before we know it’s good or bad. It’s a profound statement, so I think I will shut up and just let you admire the pearls of wisdom that I shower upon you…

I can only say one thing about marriage – You find out if it was a good decision or a bad one only twenty five years after the wedding , if not more . If you think that’s a pretty intelligent thing I have said, don’t, because I read it somewhere...

Well, Saturday afternoon and I am going to watch “Band Baaja Baarat”… Phew mere co-incidence guys… I am not hoping this movie will be an inspiration to me… but I guess this is the only hit of 2010… and after watching disasters like “Robot” …( No , don’t even ask what made me do this… And don’t even ask what that movie did to me. ) All I know is that I believe I deserve to watch a good movie … I definitely need something good to restore my faith in the movie making capabilities of bollywood directors…

And my parents definitely need something good to start believing that their girl can still appreciate a day without a laptop, sales projections and pink slip warnings in it… and someday their girl will surely get married ;) … lol…

Cheers,
Rashmi