Goshh … Arranged Marriage

Goshh … Arranged Marriage…

Well this is the most annoying and hottest topic of the “Season” … Did u hear that…. Yeahh that’s my Mahila Mandal girls yelling in the background … “I agree with you Rashmi… Finally you are writing something about the agony we girls are going thru” …

Phew… I know I am hitting the most sensitive area of all my Girl-Friends (well let me be clear…. Girls who are my friends… bass aur kuch nahii )…. Specify karna padta hai yaaroon… lotaa dirty minds around u see ;) … Well it’s not a sensitive topic because we girls want to marry… but its sensitive because our “Parents” want to see us married… ;) … well wish they wanted to see us “Happily Married”… not just “Married” …. There is a difference right ;)

While we girls were busy spending our busy life as always gossiping, traveling, enjoying… our parents thought bahut hogaya bachpana… 25 years down… now its time to hit the matrimonial site :O … Goshh… We remember when we were 18 only thing we girls used to talk about was which stream in Engineering we should go for…. When we were 21 we hit the placement jungle where in all we used to discuss was in which IT company should we be doing a crash landing ;) …. When we turned 22 all we used to discuss was my project is this this this… my onsite TL is a pain… my manager is a jack ass… When we turned 23 all we used to discuss was kitna mila yaar appraisal… 7%.... 10%... mann time for a job switch… when we turned 24 all we used to discuss was …. Bata yaar openings kaha pe haii… kitna percent hike de raha hai new company…

But now…

Now that we are 25, all we discuss is… yaar mom dad sir pe baithe hai yaar… shaadi kar karkee… c’mon there are so many better things to do apart from getting married… phew… but guess what the best part is parents ko itna tension nahi haii… but ye samaaj ye duniyaa walle … anywhere you go people ask… so when will you give us the good news… My expression goes…” Sure aunty … good news is I am flying onsite for 2 years… what’s better than that”… yeah we all girls are praying for long long onsites… money ka koi relation nahi hai onsite se… but we all have become really serious about our carriers suddenly… as our parents are thinking we aren’t serious about anything hence we should get married …. Few of my friends have also taken refuge in IIMs or some other business school… chalo issi bahane they get to live another 2 years of their lives ;) Lol… what a reason naa ;)

But the award winning dialogue was when I heard my dear friend Dhwitha yelling …

“C’mon girls, I know I am born in a gujju family… but I never hit on with any of the gujjus around me since my childhood… I don’t even hit on with my relatives…. How can my parents expect me to hit on with a gujju guy for marriage” … lol… 10 on 10 for that statement ;)

While all this was happening with in my friends lives and I was enjoying their plight and was busy killing my personal life and discovering the pathway to a life of lonely existence and talking to the pet dog I realized that mere mom dad bhi ye rat race main peeche nahi rahane walle the… they were also finding alliances for me… lol… Parents at times behave like they will get an award or something for getting their daughters married before everyone else’s…. wow…

Last month, they ran to an arranged marriage agent… God knows what criteria they mentioned but little did they know that my criterias for marriage has changed ever since my heart looks like it has met with a major accident and is recovering in an ICU or something…lol… Well , now I am a girl who is no more enamored by the external beauty and just wants a rich young/old guy ;) … Lol (Please ignore that… am just kidding…. Wish my parents don’t follow my blog)

Here I would like to mention one more award winning dialogue of my dear friend Milin… he once told me,

“Rashmi yaar ladki dhund mere liye or else my parents will do the disaster… and my criterias are very clear… she should be good looking… dekh main looks ko change nahi kar paaungaa… nature and all I can change in future ;) “ …. Lol… Clap Clap…

Ok where was I… yeah my parents running to this so called agent… wat a business naa… agent for a noble cause … uniting two hearts ;)… lol.. sorry I can really get sarcastic but I don’t wana comment much about these agents whom my parents see as “God-Sent” with an image like doves are flying around them… ;)

Chalo atleast my brother had serious reservations against this act of my parents, because he thought my profile was incomplete without the adjectives …‘She is Uncaring, Stubborn, and can kill for the TV remote” in it… Phew… Bhai hai ya dushmann ;)

Now, the problem with trying to find a husband through this route is , that unless you meet the guy , you think he is extremely good looking… (pata nai kaunsse baba aadam ke zamaane ka photo dikhaate haii… I mean , I expect no one to tell me that he looks good unless he meets me face to face) , can be in the Limca Book of Records with his talents , and is a total delight to be with ..., hates girls with their mothers alive …Not that I want a guy with or without any particular attribute , but the net problem with an arranged marriage is that people are not themselves till it may be too late to do anything about it . I mean, he may be smiling at me and thinking “I think I want to stab her with a pencil immediately.” And the same for the guy .I am sure he will have his apprehensions, which will be aggravated when he watches me throw sarcastic comments every now and then. So, the way things are going, things should get fun ...At least for you…. Lol…

And talking of shaadi , my family recently took me to this purana filmy temple . The type of temple which is talked about by ghoonghat clad women in villages , you know the "Tumne suna nahi bahin ? Uss mandir jaakar jo maango mil jaata hain." types wala temple. So while coming out of it , they saw this Pandit Maharaj who sat outside with some books and a sign that said something like "Shri Guru Maharaj Astrology Centre." And cutting short all the gory and kaali details that followed , he announced that any attempts to marry me off within next three years would be as dangerous as Mika at his birthday party. So looks like panditjee has destroyed any immediate plans of my parents for me , and I will continue to be the most eligble bachelor in my colony…. Lol… (Chalo that 1000 bucks given to the pandiiji did work) … hehe….

Phew… weird zone naa… But the best part right now is we all girls pay package is way too high and that has helped us reject 99.99% of the profiles coming our way… lol… c’mon we cant help it if these guys cant even earn 50% as much as we do… phew…

This reminds me of one more award winning dialogue…

My friend just took a switch to a new company which resulted in her pay package just hitting around 7-8 lac per annum … she told me for the first time her mom was not all that happy with the progress of her 25 year old daughter…. Her mom said, “ 4 lac ke package main ladka nahi mil raha tha… ab 8 lac package main tho ho gayi teri shaadi” … lol…

My god… ab shaadi ke liye we girls cant even go for a job switch… lol… So this is the plight of girls these days… now you know why you find girls fighting with their managers for onsite… paise waise ka koi tension nahi hai… break chahiye yaaroonnn….

In fact, talking of marriage, the more I learn, the more I believe that a marriage needs to be lived through before we know it’s good or bad. It’s a profound statement, so I think I will shut up and just let you admire the pearls of wisdom that I shower upon you…

I can only say one thing about marriage – You find out if it was a good decision or a bad one only twenty five years after the wedding , if not more . If you think that’s a pretty intelligent thing I have said, don’t, because I read it somewhere...

Well, Saturday afternoon and I am going to watch “Band Baaja Baarat”… Phew mere co-incidence guys… I am not hoping this movie will be an inspiration to me… but I guess this is the only hit of 2010… and after watching disasters like “Robot” …( No , don’t even ask what made me do this… And don’t even ask what that movie did to me. ) All I know is that I believe I deserve to watch a good movie … I definitely need something good to restore my faith in the movie making capabilities of bollywood directors…

And my parents definitely need something good to start believing that their girl can still appreciate a day without a laptop, sales projections and pink slip warnings in it… and someday their girl will surely get married ;) … lol…

Cheers,
Rashmi